For Parents of Strong Willed Children

Transcript

1:33

Hello, dear listener. Today's episode is for the parents. And maybe also for the adult children. So, I guess all of us. I have the absolute privilege of raising a very strong-willed child. She has had an opinion since before she was born and is pretty adamant about doing things her way. Basically, we have a lot in common. It is an incredible blessing to be raising a strong-willed child in this day and age. We have tools that generations before us didn't have. We are able to center emotional wellbeing. We don't have to mold children to fit gender roles or outdated standards. Children are allowed to develop their voices and are being taught that their feelings are valid. We are all learning how to experience and express our feelings in safe, healthy ways. We hear every generation say, I just want my kids to have the things I never had. For me. I had an amazing childhood. We were spoiled rotten and had the loving parents. So the things I never had are a little more subtle. I want my girl to grow up, never feeling like she has to shrink to fit anywhere. I want my girl to know that her comfort in a situation is important and that she should never center someone else's feelings or comfort level to the detriment of her own. I want her to understand what true respect is. Emotional intelligence is way more important to me than any other IQ. And kindness is a non-negotiable value. Basically, I want to nurture this tiny leader who was born with the ability to sway a room and lead an army. I want to help her develop the sensibility to use her power for good. I know she will change the world. No question. I feel my job is to be sure that her values are strong and the voice in her head is compassionate and kind. What's been an absolute trip is to recognize what parts of this directive I feel so strongly about are. More for me than for her. She challenges me in ways I could never have imagined. I'm confronting my own biases and beliefs as I try to guide her. And it is. Nuts. At this point, I have no hope that I will get this. Quote. Right. My current hope is that as we grow up together, Both of us. We'll learn how to be the best version of ourselves. And I'm sharing this message today because I have so many conversations with parents who are going through this very same process. Who are proud to have strong-willed children and are overwhelmed with choosing a new way to parent. Hoping that they are getting it right. And trying to make space for the fact that. The child inside of them. Needs reparenting as well. So for all of us who are so proud of our strong-willed children and are ready to stand behind them as they take over the world. But also wish they would wait until they leave the house to fight the system. I have a prayer for us. May this come to you when you are butting heads with those little leaders. When you are both walking the line between pushing and holding boundaries. When you are choosing different than what you grew up with. And grasping for the next right steps. When you are hit with understanding for what the generations before you were facing, when raising you. When the love in your heart needs to rise up and answer the sass before your smart mouth can. This is for you. May we both learn again and again. That we are safe in conflict. We are loved in conflict. We are protected in conflict. May we grow together in navigating a safe, loving relationship full of ups and downs. With the understanding that there is space here for individuals with big personalities, beliefs, and opinions. May we learn together how to express our needs and wants assertively. While also learning how to work together. To find solutions and a powerful path forward. May my child understand on a deep level. That they need never shrink to fit into a space or relationship. Even with me. And please, oh, please. May I be strong enough to witness and guide this little power house of a human to grow with a heart full of love and compassion. To go with that. Iron will. That will one day change the world. While this message isn't directly. From the plants. I do want to. Remind us all. That. We are part of nature. We are all always growing and changing. Evolving. There is space for mistakes. There is space for trying again. And sometimes when the voice in our head is not compassionate and loving. It takes tapping into the energy of a very old Cedar tree or whatever plant being comes to you with kindness and compassion. To remember that you do have that inside of you. And there is a well, you can access. So my friend, if you are parenting others or maybe just reparenting yourself. I offer a gentle reminder to go along with this prayer. That when you need support. And you need to tap into that well of love the plants are here for us. Step outside and open to the possibilities and the love that is floating all around you. Take a deep breath. And remember you are doing a great job. Big love my friends.